Five Stanley Cup Stocks For a Bruins Victory

Rooting for the Canucks in these Stanley Cup finals is like rooting for Cobra Kai Dojo in the Karate Kid. They're thugs, they (literally) bit another player, and they let some third-rate defensemen knock a Bruin out for the playoffs with a concussion. They're dirty and they deserve to get smoked like Mark Cuban's forthcoming victory cigar.

When (not if, when) the Bruins finish off the Canucks, here are five investments to consider.

Beer Boston Beer (NYSE: SAM) Just about every sporting event is celebrated with spirits and beers. Is there a more topical choice than Sam Adams, Boston's most decorated nation-wide brew?

Silver iShares Silver Trust ETF (NYSE: SLV) It's been so long since Canada held the Stanley Cup that America's Hat might want to consider crafting another version of the Cup for their own teams to occasionally glance at while the Americans parade the real one around Detroit, Chicago, or Boston. Considering the Cup is made of a silver-nickel alloy, silver might make sense here.

Pie!!! Sara Lee (NYSE: SLE) Whether it is a pie to the face in celebration or a pie to the waist in remorse-eating, Sara Lee's frozen pies have something to offer fans of both sides. I recommend the French Silk.

Drug Testing Kits Psychemedics (NASDAQ: PMD) This drug test company could go big after the Cup is awarded to Boston. It's likely that half of Vancouver will get stoned to forget the beating they took at the hands of the Bruins, and employers may want to see who is and who isn't toking up.

Boston Boston Properties (NYSE: BXP) After they get done owning Vancouver, perhaps Bruins fans will want to (literally) own a piece of their own city.