Today is International Talk Like a Pirate Day
Is today really an international holiday? Yarr! I was somewhat surprised to see Wall Street open on this, the day that celebrates looting, graft, theft, and operates under its own twisted moral code. One would think Goldman Sachs (NYSE: GS) would jump at the opportunity to revel in the plundering of treasure!
The holiday stems from the fact that, well, life is short and should be made fun of, as often as possible. That's certainly the spirit on display at the official International Talk Like a Pirate Day website.
"The best explanation came from a guy at a Cleveland radio station who interviewed us on the 2002 Talk Like a Pirate Day. He told us we were going to be buried by people asking for interviews because it was a "whimsical alternative" to all the serious things that were making the news so depressing," the group says on the site.
So what do you do on a holiday like this? Well, other than drink rum, wear an eye patch, and hijack boats off the coast of Somalia? You have fun! Set down the bluetooth and turn off the laptop for five minutes, and just have fun. Throw some pirate words at your co-workers and see if they're in the mood, too.
What's that? You don't know any pirate words? Try these scenarios out.
Your boss walks in and tells you to stay for the weekend. Say "aye aye"...and then throw some chum into his coffee.
While out to lunch, you notice an extremely attractive person you want your coworker to take a look at. Shout "Avast, a Beauty!"
When the beauty ooks your way, wave, and throw him/her an "Ahoy, matey!"
That's right. Pirate talk can get you laid. The group offers a Top Ten list for pickup lines to use on this holiest of holy days.
Top Ten Pickup lines for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day
10 . Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?
9. Have ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?
8. Come on up and see me urchins.
7. Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.
6. I'd love to drop anchor in your lagoon.
5. Pardon me, but would ya mind if I fired me cannon through your porthole?
4. How'd you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?
3. Ya know, darlin', I'm 97 percent chum free.
2. Well blow me down?
And the number one pickup line for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day is …
1. Prepare to be boarded.
Of course, these aren't the only reasons to speak pirate today. There's also the satisfaction of knowing that, everywhere you go, you'll be irritating someone. There's a Grumpy McGrumpsAlot in every group. You might get some joy out of ruining his day. You'll also cause more than a few people to doubt your sanity. This is always a good thing.
Just remember: no matter what else happens today, plunder some booty. Yarrrrrr!
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